9th August, 1915

My only one! I have not felt as good as yesterday for a long time. A proper Sunday! In the morning I got your letter of 2nd June. This fact alone lifted my mood by several octaves, but it was the content of the letter that made me really happy. You can't know how I worry about all sorts of things and one of these worries concerned the feeding of the baby. Now you write that you are breast feeding him yourself. I hope you don't overdo it and that you will immediately wean him off if you notice the signs of weakening.

But alas, how I long again for you and the children since yesterday! When I consider of how much happiness and joy I am deprived! However, I must not complain. How terrible was the uncertainty about Hugo's and Viktor's fate, now I know that they are (or at least were 2 months ago) in good health. The Almighty has been most gracious. I hope he will protect us all in the future too.

I was so happy and cheerful yesterday that I invited my friends for a little party and they accepted with great pleasure. We had excellent coffee, pastry and cigarettes or cigars. It so happened that other gentlemen had also their reasons to be in a good mood and consequently we were feasting at many tables covered by clean sheets. The officers' band which I mentioned earlier went into action and we had a very acceptable concert. You see, we have light moments here too.

The weather is inclement now. Three days ago the temperature fell suddenly overnight. The previous day the thermometer showed over 30 degrees in the shade and in the last 3 days it never got above 15 degrees. On the day before yesterday it was only 12 degrees and we were all freezing. Yesterday, as if it felt the general good mood, the weather was also a bit brighter but today it is again grey, dull and cold. Well, in a few weeks the Siberian winter will begin again.

I would have never thought that you were so pessimistic. I laughed heartily when I read your remark that perhaps our little boy will come running to welcome me when I ultimately come home. He must be a splendid fellow indeed because, although I am quite a pessimist myself, I cannot believe that our separation will last so long that he would learn to walk in the meantime. It may well last long yet, we have to be prepared for that, but one day the end must come and then, darling, then comes happiness. You can have no idea how fervently I love you. I think I am justified in saying that my love has been rejuvenated and become more profound. I never perceived more how utterly I belong to you more than I do now. And in front of me is the wooden fence, the soldier with his fixed bayonet - I am prisoner! Still, my love, I will come and embrace and hug you! You and our children!

© The estate of Otto Feldmann: Monica Lanyado, Tzafrah Shushan and Aya Shochat